Category Archives: Opinion Post

The circus is coming to town!

12 Wednesday Feb 2025

Posted by in General, Opinion Post, Purely Academic

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This is something I wrote in June 2024 when I was about to apply for Ad Hominem promotion at CPUT. At the time, I wasn’t sure about publishing it. Fearful, scared I would be judged. I’m feel more grounded now, (I think getting that AP job offer from UJ among other things helped) – so I’m more confident about nailing my colours to the wall – it’s a piece about recognizing toxic environments….or maybe rather, toxic habits or traits in myself!

I want to talk about addiction. I have to come clean—I never formally studied the theory of addiction. I first heard about it in passing during a dinner conversation with a colleague, just like I heard about the theory of resilience today over tea. (Side note: resilience isn’t a trait; it’s a process. Researchers study it by tracking whether a person follows a predefined process, leading to three different ‘levels’ of resilience. Fascinating stuff.) Anyway let’s get back on topic… where were we, with addiction right?

It’s about 3:30 a.m., and my eyes flew open ten minutes ago. I slept well, went to bed early (9 p.m.), and had a full day of meetings—online and face-to-face—stretching from 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. After that, I briefly caught up with Tony and the kids, brushed my teeth, and called it a night.

But for some unknown reason (maybe because I’m simply done sleeping), a thought I had caused me to wake up, and my mind immediately latched onto my to-do list. It feels overwhelming again—even though I worked hard from March to May, meeting deadlines, writing two papers, and submitting two proposals, so I could take it easier for the rest of the year.

I can’t even remember what the thought was that woke me up. But I remember how it made me feel—an immediate, visceral sense of fear and dread. That’s crazy, right? I shouldn’t be waking up at 3 a.m., my first thought about work triggering a fight-or-flight response. Yet, here I am.

My gut reaction? I need to get out of this job. But is it really my job? Or is it me doing this to myself?

Breaking this cycle isn’t easy. And this is where I see the connection to addiction…

Before I continue on the topic of addiction, I’d like to sketch a little bit of background for the context I find myself in – The university just released the call for Ad Hominem promotion. Those of us who plan to apply must submit a portfolio of evidence, which a panel will scrutinize to decide if we meet the criteria for advancement. I’ll be applying for a promotion from Senior Lecturer to Associate Professor.

The problem? I don’t know if my portfolio is good enough.

Some things are in place—I have research output, but I don’t meet all the criteria. My H-index is only 5 (not above 6, as required). I haven’t graduated any PhD students, just master’s students. I’m self-funding my research but haven’t secured big externally funded grants for the university. And from evaluating teaching portfolios for Teaching Excellence Award purposes I also know it’s not always about what you’ve done, it’s sometimes about the way you’ve written it up!

As I submit my application, I know the best approach is to detach from the outcome. Apply, but don’t take the result personally. But that’s easier said than done.

So getting back to the topic of addiction, a colleague recently told me that addiction often stems from an unmet need. And I totally get that. At different points in my life, I was dependent on alcohol and cigarettes. Back then, they were crutches—coping mechanisms. It took a long time but as my circumstances changed, I let go of them naturally, without anyone forcing me.

The pain I was numbing somehow eased, and I no longer needed those toxic habits. I still don’t fully understand what that pain was (I suspect it was related to my sense of self esteem), but I know this: once it lessened, I didn’t crave alcohol or cigarettes anymore.

Now, when I think about work, I feel something eerily similar—like it’s a ‘substance’ that I can’t put down – even though I know it’s affecting me in ways that aren’t healthy. I have to take a moment to let that sink in…. Work looks like it’s good for me but is it really? Is it the work Bronwyn? – or is it you that’s addicted to work? Has it just become another crutch to make me feel better about my life situation – my sense of self-worth or esteem? And in terms of the work – is it really about “the work” or “what others think/feel/say about the work?”

Wait, what? what others think and not what I think? Sounds like putting on a show doesn’t it? – a dog and pony show. In the words of our former president JZ, for who? For what? For why?

I look around, and I see so many academics that seem to be caught in the same cycle—some chasing grants, others chasing publications, others chasing titles or status, all of us chasing something. It’s like a tidal wave, sweeping everyone in its path. I wonder, do they feel like I do?

Earlier this year, I admired a colleague who seemed immune to all of this. She told me none of it mattered. I thought, wow I want to be like that.

Then, two days ago, she asked me to review her portfolio—for her Ad Hominem application. No one is immune? I don’t know her reasons, and I’m not judging her. I’m just battling to tell the wood from the trees at the moment.

It would be easy to say, just walk away. Quit the job. Remove the trigger. That’s what addiction recovery often suggests—avoid the environment that leads to relapse.

But I don’t think quitting is the answer.

This isn’t about bravado or pushing through until I burn out. I think it’s about boundaries. Identifying the ‘lines of insanity’ before I cross them. Figuring out what I’m trying to feed with my work addiction.

Because if I can see the game for what it really is—a dog and pony show—then maybe I can stop playing it on autopilot.

Too many regulations, too little thought: Cape Town, a Tale of Two Cities. South Africa, a Place of ‘Haves’ and ‘Not haves’

03 Sunday May 2020

Posted by in General, Opinion Post

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A lovely conversation I had yesterday with a fellow blogger Stroke Survivor led to me articulating my feelings about Lockdown in South Africa (Thank you Stroke Survivor!). We’re on 39 days now, so by and large, the South African society are past the stage of feeling panicked or anxious (fearful mode), curious and intrigued (selfie-taking mode), and even angry or sad (grieving mode).

We’re getting used to our new normal, and many of us just want to go on with our lives – whatever form that takes on now! At the same time however we find ourselves questioning the validity of the regulations being imposed on us. We accept that we have a new reality but we’re tired now. Tired of being scared to breath, tired of being scared to live, tired of feeling like hostages in this passive aggressive pyscho-thriller reality series that is our lives!download

So below is an extracted part of the comment section of yesterday’s blog post “South African Gløgg” however reflecting on it today, I felt that it deserves its own space on my blog – although I’m not going to edit my original words. My response was authentic and not at all premeditated – and that’s why I want to share it.

 

Stroke Survivor asked me about the logic behind our country’s current prohibition of alcohol. My response follows:

“Gosh Stroke Survivor, I don’t understand our regulations myself! I have South African friends abroad in Belgium that are just as shocked.

Initially, as South Africans we were all behind our government’s strict regulations to flatten the curve, but it’s literally in very practical terms becoming unbearable for many. We are a society characterized by a large proportion of ‘haves’ and then an equally large proportion of ‘have nots’.

Without getting into politics, simply put, our very strict regulations, while well-meaning are f’up up and discriminatory towards the poor, the people who drink alcohol, the people who smoke, and the people who don’t exercise…. there may be others.

For example, no alcohol is sold in this time because the consumption of alcohol encourages gatherings and social activity – so No Alcohol whatsoever. No cigarettes, because according to our government- cigarettes are ‘supposedly’ synonymous with alcohol consumption. I’m not a smoker (anymore) but I can only imagine how difficult this must be for smokers.

I think inadvertently, our government is potentially facilitating ordinarily law abiding citizens to resort to non-law abiding behaviour simply because of their rigidness. They are turning ordinarily law abiding citizens into criminals, not because the citizens have changed – but rather because our regulations have changed. Grossly unfair.

Ultimately all the government is succeeding in doing is creating black market, because they are destroying the free market in South Africa. By imposing a billion illogical regulations, our government is successfully destroying all our citizens respect for the law. This makes me sad. But this is the way that it is.

Another example is those of a ridiculous law is all those who want to exercise may only go for a walk, run or cycle between 6am and 9am in the morning – I won’t go into detail about all the problems which crop out because of that – however the biggest one is arguably everyone, I mean EVERYONE with their dogs, cats and nannies are out in common communal areas that time because we’ve been confined to our houses for the past five weeks #PerfectRecipeForCOVID19Spread. ….Makes no effing sense.

No one is allowed to work (by implication earn money) without a ‘permit’ which confirms that you are performing an essential service, so people are really suffering economically. And these are people who were suffering before lockdown – the current regulations simply makes it worse! I think in South Africa we are no longer even scared of COVID19. After all the strict constraints on our personal freedom we want to take our chances with COVID19…. and that is primarily due to government enforcing crazy regulations.

But I shall stop bitching. The one thing that we all have in common is we want SA to get through this crisis as unscathed as possible. How I don’t know. I’m actually glad that my biggest problem is figuring out how much sugar to put in my mulled wine….

I have real empathy for the leaders of my country. At the moment I don’t believe that they doing a good job- but I hope they figure it out soon!”

Rules for being human

18 Tuesday Feb 2020

Posted by in Family and Friends, General, My Adventures, Opinion Post

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I saw this post on Instagram a few months ago, and it struck me as something really cool – so I saved the picture (Photo credit House of Yoga – my yoga studio in Claremont). I have been battling with personal situation since January and by processing my emotions, I had a meaningful life experience – from absolute inner turmoil to freedom, liberation and peace. I woke up from a nap this afternoon and for some reason remembered the picture and suddenly it struck me that I can write a narrative of the experience and align it to these rules… so here goes.

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Rule number 1: I have received a body that identifies me as woman. I’ve several typical traits of women all around the world – nothing particularly special about me. I get hungry, and tired and I get bored. I laugh, I cry. Sometimes I’m moody, but most of the time I’m bouncy and passionate about life. And just like every other woman I fall in love…

Rule number 2: I fell in love and got involved with particular man and from this experience came one of my lessons. A ‘good man’ by his own standards. I guess no one is perfect, but not a good enough man for me. It took ‘the experience‘ of our relationship (my lesson) for me to realise that. My intention with this post is not to bash him at all. I wish him well, but I’m sharing my story here because I feel that it is worth sharing. Maybe someone out there can relate, find comfort or amusement from it.

Rule number 3: I’m so tempted to think of my relationship with this man as a mistake. However in recent years I have started believing that everything and everyone in the universe is connected. We are all part of a great system and are co-dependent. A common misconception that I believe many of us fall prey to, is believing that we are alone in this thing called ‘life’. It’s a nasty trick that our ego plays on us. Ego itself is not bad thing as long as we keep it in check – the purpose of the ego is to ensure that we survive as a species. So everyone’s ego has them believing that they need to look out for themselves, that they need to protect themselves. In days of the caveman this was a crucial survival mechanism, when we needed to fend off wild animals, but this is no longer a requirement for our survival. When I turned 40 I started realising that a more peaceful, happier life comes from realising that I am part of the whole, despite what my ego says to me. It’s a move away from thinking that ‘things happen to me’, and rather that ‘things happen around me’. In all of our lives there are things that happen that are challenging (downright difficult) to deal with, that leave us suffering and reeling in pain and feeling like there should be no tomorrow. And yet, in retrospect, even what seemed like the worst situation at a particular time in my own life, was actually a seed from which I eventually harvested fruit – albeit years later. Everything is connected to the whole. Everything is connected to the source – and for that reason there have been no mistakes in my own life – including my relationship with this man. No mistakes.

Rule number 4: My relationship with this man was a repeated lesson. In 2011/12, I had a remarkably similar experience, when I was also in an intimate relationship with someone and he was seeing someone else too. Not sure if I was the side chic, or she was the side chic? Who knows. Two-timing is not the issue here – Not important for me to delve into that at all – #DifferentStrokesForDifferentFolks. The point of this blog post is to focus on my own response to the discovery. Back in 2012, when that chap ‘broke’ up with me, he didn’t actually break up with me in person. Previous boyfriend also just ghosted me. He just disappeared without any explanation. Gone. This sent me into a downward emotional spiral of feeling loss. The pain and uncertainty of not knowing what had happened left me spinning like a top. I agonised, berated myself and beat myself up and went into semi-isolation because of my shame, for about nine months trying to figure out what I did wrong (which by the way is the ego stepping in to unsuccessfully prevent something like that happening again). I could not understand because he was the one who pursued me, and it went from him being all over my space, to periodically being in my space, to nothing at all. I even thought it was because of my children and work – that I didn’t have enough time for him – that I wasn’t good enough for him. It is uncanny when I think about it now, how this most recent experience that I had is almost identical to eight years ago.

Rule number 5: Today I am better equipt to deal with this situation. It still hurt like a mother-fucker, but all the subsequent lessons that I had since that first breakup, prepared me to manage my most recent breakup. Lessons like ‘in the end it’s only kindness that matters‘, ‘self-compassion is the greatest healing salve’, ‘mindfulness makes life more bearable’ and ‘whatever happened has already happened -it’s done‘ and most importantly ‘I am not alone – there are people who love me unconditionally around me, even though I still hadn’t learnt to love myself unconditionally’. This time round I took some ‘time out’ to become aware of the feelings causing me pain, and I treated myself like a wounded child – just like I would treat one of my own children. And then, I also reached out to four of my very best friends and two brothers – I didn’t not tell them what was wrong (because it still hurt too much), but I asked for their prayers and support. And they rallied around me – so grateful. In retrospect, I understand that my healing is taking place at an exponential rate because of other ‘lessons’ (bad experiences in the past)

Rule number 6: The compassion that I received from my friends and brothers made me realise that essentially the pain and hurt that I was experiencing is caused by my own mind. This time around, from a different perspective I realise that my ‘loss’ isn’t a real loss – not a significant loss in the greater scheme of things. The rest of my life still lies ahead of me (related to Lesson number 8). If I was still involved with the man who broke my heart in January, who know what future we would have had. The fact that he hurt me means that he is hurting – I don’t believe that anyone aside from sociopaths can deceive another without hurting themselves to a degree. Maybe he doesn’t feel it now, or represses it for years but eventually he will have to come to terms with his own behaviour – whatever the case – it’s none of my business any longer. My only business is letting go of my pain now, so that my ‘better’ tomorrow comes sooner. If I am capable of doing that now, then ‘here and now’ doesn’t need to be any worse than ‘then and there’ in the future.

Rule number 7: This is related to what I said about one person hurting another. What happened was because our insecurities – why would anyone ‘play the field’? We were intimate partners and yet the topic of commitment caused great anguish. And here’s the kicker – I’m not happy about what he did, but I really and truly understand it. I felt his lack of commitment and we even spoke about ‘us’ continuing with blinkers. I ignored my gut feelings. I suspect he did too which is why he did what he did. Ultimately, I attracted someone into my life who had the same broken pieces that I had. Because we really are one, I hope that both he and I are able to fix our broken pieces (just certainly not together). From here on, I’m taking fuller responsibility for fixing mine (yet another lesson in this lesson). It becomes apparent that a part of me still believed that having a partner was going to make me feel whole again. What transpired between him and I shattered the last remnants of that false belief. I don’t know exactly how yet, I am solely going to make me feel whole again.

Rule number 8 and 9:… notice now I’m getting a bit bored (refer to Rule number 1) so I’m doing 8 and 9 together, time to finish. So I choose to let go of my pain and continue living my best life. Sure, this means that I’m going to Thailand on my own, and also on a biking trip to Vietnam alone – but maybe not…. who knows. All that matters is that I have tomorrow, and whatever other days the source gives me. My life is still full of unrealised potential – as long as I am not scared. And I’m not scared. My life is a canvas, and canvas still feels half empty. There are some pretty amazing designs on it already, but why not … I think the rest of the designs I put on my canvas will be even better than what’s on it now!

Rule number 10: The answers that rescued me from my distress were and are indeed all inside of me. With a little help from my loved ones and my mediation app (Thank you Insight Timer), my inner turmoil has subsided.  I now make a conscious effort not shame myself for another failed relationship. Peace returns to my life, not through my own wisdom, but rather through the collective wisdom of the giant unit that I am part of – Gaia, the Universe, God, call it what you want to. The answers are all there. My job is just not to resist the pain that will lead me to these answers. By following the pain that comes from inside of us, with humility, we are able locate the fears that are the source of the pain, and then able to let go of it. The collective wisdom that resides within us reminds us that it does not serve us any good, and therefore we don’t need to hold onto pain. In this chapter of my story, it means that I do not need to hold on to him, or any of the memories of him. I just really don’t need him at all in my life. With love, I can release all the ties I have to him. This seemed absolutely impossible a few days ago, and yet tapping into the wisdom from deep within tells me to choose myself and my wellbeing first, over anyone else’s opinions. #NoShame

Rule number 11: Yeah, I probably will forget all of this.

Rule number 12: And yes, when I need to, I will remember it again. Namaste

Not-a-failure

13 Saturday Apr 2019

Posted by in General, Opinion Post, Touchy-Feely Crap

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Image credit: https://www.management-issues.com/opinion/5882/if-you-want-to-succeed-get-used-to-failure/

Failure is a good thing. We’ve all heard this before. No one can deny that failing builds character. It builds resilience. It builds problem solving capabilities and it can make one a more compassionate, a valuable individual to the benefit of society at large. In that way failure promotes growth.

It’s noteworthy though, that the word ‘failure’ implies that something went wrong. Either we did something or we did not do something, when we could have done something different = failure.

Against this backdrop, I think that we often confuse failing with something else. I actually can’t define that ‘something else’ yet ….. I just don’t have the term for it yet although I know it’s a tangible concept. It also leads to growth but it is not failure. Let’s call it ‘not-a-failure‘. It is confused with failure because the process towards growth is so similar to when you failed at something.

In the case of ‘not-a-failure‘ a person might even say ‘but I tried my best but I did not succeed’. This means that what you tried was wrong. This emphasizes the person’s effort and the fact that they did not get the reward for that effort. When this happens, most human beings involuntarily turn against themselves and believe that they have failed ….when in fact they did not, because in cases of not-a-failure, the situation was just outside of one’s control.

Ok Ja what I’m saying might like waffle but let me use real examples from my own life to explain…

The job I took, after I finished studying my Masters degree. It was a disaster. I just didn’t fit. There were tons of variables that played a role including an insecure micromanaging supervisor. I tried my best but eventually resigned after a year. I felt like a failure…. but did I really fail? Fast-forward a few years and I ended up in my dream job, teaching at a University. Resigning from that job freed me in terms of time, to do things which gave me the experience I needed to apply for my current job.

My marriage. I worked so hard to save it. I was devastated, shattered when my ex-husband left me. There are things that I know I could have done differently but I think that truthfully, the majority of what played out was simply just out of my control. Looking back I see that no matter who said or did what, we were both just not mature enough to manage the situation in a way that would change the eventual outcome, which was a divorce. Failure? Yes, No… there was more out of my control than in my control. Growth yes definitely. In retrospect, failure not. Similar too, other relationships since my divorce. I have the tendency to want to think I’ve failed because each time I’ve genuinely opened up and allowed myself to be vulnerable. When one is openly vulnerable and you don’t achieve a successful outcome then you feel like failure. The same would apply to sporting activities, work or other projects or even friendships that don’t work out even after you tried your best.

The ‘not-a-failure‘ concept really is an intense form of disappointment. Disappointment is a result of failure but, importantly, it’s not always because of failure. The mistake that I think many human beings make is associating all our disappointments with failure. Our brains seem to be hardwired into tricking us into believing that all our disappointments are all failures! How unkind we are to ourselves 😔

The bottom line for me with all of this is that I need to remember to be kinder to myself when I feel disappointment. Not medicate disappointments with self-pity, or anger, humiliation or shame. I need to medicate myself with kindness and reject any self deprecating thoughts which tell me that I have failed.

Essentially, that is the act of surrendering control over something I never had control over in the first place!

Go on… You have the power

09 Tuesday Oct 2018

Posted by in General, Opinion Post

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All that we are arises in our own thoughts. So with our thoughts my dear friends, we are the creators of our world.

The power lies with us…

From: http://whisper.sh/whisper/0549bf80673a4cf75e4a7c379ebb53591cec6a/There-is-nothing-called-as-right-or-wrong-Its-just-perspective-and-j

So it makes sense to invest your energy where your power is doesn’t it – invest the energy in you

Happy Tuesday Beautiful People. Let’s create ourselves a Beautiful World 🌍

Namaskar

13 Thursday Sep 2018

Posted by in My Adventures, Opinion Post

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🙏🏾 On this beautiful spring morning, one strong beating heart. I am part of this world.

No identity, no background narrative, no defining label.

Not a woman, not a mother, not a child, nor a sister. Not a partner. Not a friend. Not a teacher or a colleague. Not a student. Not a runner, surfer. Not a biker. Not a divorcée or anything else.

Nothing but essence. Just the awareness behind my emotions. Nothing more than the awareness behind my thoughts.

And that is enough.

I am enough.

#RacismMustFall

29 Sunday Jul 2018

Posted by in General, Opinion Post

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I am a fallible human being and my opinions are just my opinions. I fully trust my heart though and this morning, both my heart and my mind are in coherence after I read this article on News24: https://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/dont-be-scared-of-the-land-debate-malema-tells-whites-20180728

This situation that the majority of ordinary South Africans are tolerating is not only nonsense but it is highly dangerous! I think it’s time we start collectively holding our leaders accountable.

Julius Malema is an outright racist. And he isn’t afraid because we are giving him permission to be a racist. So we are also accountable. Nothing good has ever come or will come from labeling people – and he does that all the time, to gain popularity from the majority vote. He constantly reminds us South Africans of our racial difference to gain popularity for his political cause and gain.

I ask myself what tangible good thing has Julius done for South Africa? Anything anyone? One little thing? I can’t think of anything.

He stirs, using racist arguments all the time. He is very intelligent and he is dangerous. He manipulates. He knows precisely what to say to get an emotional response and he uses this outcome (or support) to further his own objectives.

Good South Africans – do we really see parallel planes in what Julius wants to do for our country and what Madiba did? I don’t. I don’t see someone that wants to build our country or is genuinely interested in the wellbeing of all our people.

I see an angry, bitter and fiercely intelligent man who has a destructive agenda. I see someone who fuels division in the country along racial lines with hate speech under the guise of wanting to relieve the suffering of the people. I don’t see someone who really cares about the people. Anyone seen him visit an old age home or a school? Raise funds for cancer or aids research maybe? A bursary for an underprivileged kid maybe? Nada… He only cares about himself and his own political agenda. He is only interested in ‘getting back’ at the ANC for mistreating him. The media gives him airtime and then he uses the unhappiness of the unfairly treated majority to openly pick on the minority. Hey…. Wasn’t there a guy in Germany in the 1940s who did the same?….

Let’s not label each other by the colour of our skins. We’ve come through too much South Africans to allow anyone to trick us into believing that is ok again to be racist. It’s not ok. It will never be ok. In our history, there are thousands who sacrificed their lives or spent years in prison in the fight against racism – Thousands paid the price – let us not forget that. What is happening now is Julius has come in an is undermining all that sacrifice by telling people that racism is ok. It’s not really racism if it Black against White this time is it, no?

Let us not be blind and let us build. What are our values? What do we value? …. Equality? – yes. Education? – yes. Decent living conditions for all South Africans? – hell yes.

South Africans let us be mindful of this – mindful of what our good core values are and let us not allow any person to use us by impressing their personal agendas on us, thereby eroding our core values. We have a beautiful country and beautiful people of all different races in our country which is precisely what makes us beautiful. This is our strength. That is the South Africa I want for my children. Let’s say an unequivocal NO to hate.

#RacismMustFall

Fees must not fall

14 Sunday Jan 2018

Posted by in Family and Friends, General, Opinion Post, Purely Academic

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So yes, I am being incredibly brave, and the truth is I am not at all scared of my own opinion. Opinions are dynamic evolving things and for now this is mine.

Over lunch yesterday, my best friends and I had a great conversation and engaging debate, which got me thinking about the content of this blog post. Who knows how it started, talk about cheese and beer drifted into a conversation on societal  inequalities, and an opinion was expressed that education is the key to change (this I agree with) however a continuation of this sentiment is that education should be free (and this… I most vehemently disagree with).

Nothing can ever be free. Not even love. Everything in life costs something. The love from even your mother comes at a cost to her. If it did not, it would not be so powerful. Anything and everything that is worthwhile in life comes at some sort of sacrifice. So hold on …..wait, before I become too philosophical, let’s backtrack because I think my friend/s meant in the more practical sense. The example of Sweden was offered as a model for free education. Very practical yes….. and IMNSHO, very ridiculous yes! It is outright insane to compare South Africa with Sweden. Sweden is a very socialist country, because they can afford to be socialist. As in literally (they have the money) to afford to be socialist. Their basic human rights are taken care of – in South Africa ours are not. Without that, any plight to educate will be futile.

Education is more than studying from a few books, writing a few research papers, getting a degree or three or seven. It is not the cognitive abilities of our society that will fix our problems, it is our metacognitive abilities that will do this. Our thinking about our thinking. The foundation for our  metacognitive abilities is only fertilized through socialisation. You can be smart, but a sociopath at the same time. And those fuckers are absolutely no good to society.

It is at grassroots that we must foster development. The past is in the past. Yes I was not popular with my friends for saying that, but I will stick to my guns.

We have what we have. Now – the present. No actions now will undo what was done. There is always the option for vengeance (….yes peoples that what it is – call it whatever else you want to now, but know that it is vengeful to 20 years ex post facto lash out now for something that was not addressed). AND vengeance stagnates growth #Fact. Again IMNSHO, there is no difference in looking at this from a personal point of view. Let’s say I had an abusive husband…. treated me like dirt, emotionally disempowered me, the shit beat me to pulp regularly and verbally lambasted me for years…you get the story. We got divorced – and we each got our settlement. A settlement we agreed upon. Some years later I am unhappy because my life still isn’t going according to the ideal I thought it would – so now I want to go back and take more of what I feel is rightfully mine. It’s driven by emotion…. and yes THAT is vengeful. While there would be some comfort to be gained from vengeance – it’s comfort that is short-lived and short-sighted.

Education is the key, but redressing the more basic problems in society is needed before an attempt at educating the nation will be successful. Academic degrees won’t make us a better or more caring society – and that’s actually what we really need. Not more educated people, more caring people! We need to address those needs first. Higher education (HE) is a luxury, when security, health care and basic education is so severely restricted as it is in our country.  One has to actually respect the ingenious way certain politicians use the thought, the notion of HE as a carrot, which they dangle in front of the masses, getting them to believe that is the solution. It’s really clever.

A note of education…. UCT and MIT have a comprehensive selection of MOOCs which are freely available. Surprise, surprise….there are cost free options to educate oneself! However perhaps because current “paid for” university education seems more “prestigious” … the politicians would have us believe that it is key. Sadly MOOCs cannot be fully utilised without basic needs such as a safe learning environment. Besides that, the throughput in general is not good…. Why?, again IMNSHO because it is free – so the quality of what is offered is not on par with a paid for face to face course. It takes time, energy and resources to develop and offer educational content that is worthwhile – Anything that is free, is not worth as much as something that has come at some sort of sacrifice. Why should education be different to food? It would sound outrageous and ridiculous if people demanded free food from the government, wouldn’t it? Why doesn’t it sound ridiculous when people demand absolutely free education? Or does it……

Anyway, I could go on and on and on, but enough of this already. Time to get on with my jobs – coincidentally, one of them is being an open education practitioner (For example I use YouTube to make educational resources available for free for any/all students who need help with stats) …. so I have nothing else to prove. My views on educating people, and facilitating public access to educational resources is clear. But as a whole, South African society – we are not ready for Fees to Fall.